Aaron wrote recently about EBSCOHost Connection, a service from EBSCO that puts their source material into search engines, then lets end users log in through their library.

Nice idea. It’s something I’m interested in: how do we get the library materials into the search engines?

Sometimes you see hits from JSTOR or PubMed also, and searching around, I’m catching journals from Wiley as well. There are probably others, and like Aaron, I hadn’t heard of the service from EBSCO either.

Aaron found the EBSCO hits when he was searching for “Triumph Triple Connection” - from what I can tell, is some kind of branded textile used for making motorcycle leathers. Aaron is like 7 feet tall, has lots of tattoos and commutes from Portland to DC on a motorcycle, so this makes total sense.

But what doesn’t make sense is why an article without the word ‘connection’ in it would show up in the search results at all, until you notice that EBSCO puts the words ‘EBSCOHost Connection’ at the beginning of the HTML <title> tag for every article they let the search engines index.

By branding their material this way, they destroy most chances anyone ever had for finding the material. I’m going to assume there are no accidental searches with the word ‘EBSCOHost’ in them, so either:

a) your search includes the word ‘connection’ and an irrelevant article shows up (’crater lake connection’, ‘connection section election’)

OR b) your search includes the word ‘connection’ and there is already reliable information on the web about the subject (’electrical connection’, ‘french connection’) [so hits from EBSCOHost Connection are ranked way low]

OR c) you search doesn’t use this word but search engines think it is so important to your page that it ignores you.

OR d) you accidentally type the word connection twice (’french connection connection’) and you’re golden.

I noticed that JSTOR and PubMed and Wiley don’t have this problem, but for the most part, their products still have stupid names. Here are my favorite (as in least favorite) branded library products.

Disclaimer: jokes may only be funny to me:

10. Anything you named your library catalog (as much as I loved you, Barton, Albert and Wili). Lucky us, this trend appears to have subsided.

9. CQ Researcher: Like other products listed here, your acronym doesn’t make any sense to people who have never heard of your product before. Don’t use the acronym! On the internet, text is cheap. Say what you are.

8. Serials Solutions: okay, it is a fine name for your company (now their company), because you provided a solution to a problem with serials, namely, knowing what periodicals are indexed where. The solution? A big list. It is not something libraries should say and expect people to know what it is. Say ‘big list of what periodicals are indexed where’.

7. Computer Database (from Gale): I am pretty sure that Computer Database figures prominently in a 1980s spy/robot thriller. How about a nice game of chess?

6. MasterFile Premier: I can’t say this without trying to do my best James Earl Jones pronunciation. What’s in this one, again?

5. InfoTrac: I get the info part, but don’t quite follow the Trac. InfoTrek? That sounds like it is going to take a long time.

4. MAS Ultra (from EBSCOHost): It was years before I realized that this database wasn’t in Spanish. And that it wasn’t an add for a monster truck show. ultra, Ultra, ULTRA!

3. ABI/INFORM: I don’t even know what to say here. ABI/INFORM makes ‘Business Source Premier’ sound like a stroke of branding genius.

2. ALLDATA: ALL of it? rly?

1. EBSCOHost : Half corporate acronym, half zombie army, EBSCOHost is coming to get you.

I can mostly really only make fun of databases I use, and for complicated reasons, I am not commenting on the names of any statewide reference services. If that sort of thing gets to you, please don’t hesitate to mention it on my account.

What are your favorites?